A Bit of Wiggle Room Helps

Ever been spoken to in an angry manner by someone higher than yourself? When someone has sternly laid out how things are going to be and that you have no say in the matter, have you sat there thinking, "Why are they speaking like that? Why won't they listen to my perspective?"
Often when someone starts growling at us, as adults, we can become defensive and respond in similar fashion to how we perceived we are being spoken to.


With the pace of teaching and learning, and all eyes being on achieving next learning steps, meeting learning goals, reaching national standards. The treadmill can sometimes be cranked up to full speed. In these moments, it can be easy, at times, for teachers to subconsciously transfer our sense of pressure onto the students in terms of putting pressure on them to perform. The learning needs to be demonstrated in the work, in order, in a way that meets success criteria, before testing and moderating to prove that progress is happening.

A lesson I have re-learned is that these are kids. They have good days and bad days, just like us. They have things that they are subjected to that motivate or upset them, just like us. Sometimes they wake up in the morning and feel like today is just too hard, just like us. When they feel that the pressure is too much and they are struggling to think of everything they need to do, and cope in doing it all, they can snap. Just like us.
Often, in our students lives, they have little or no say on what happens to them, what they can do or when they do it. If they feel frustrated or confused, what are their options?


Expectations can be explained just as easily in a reasoned tone, even implicitly. By giving students the wiggle room to allow the message to be absorbed in a clam manner, we give our them the opportunity to allow themselves to make good choices without having to 'save face', and we give ourselves some room to escalate action if bad choices continue to be deliberately made.


Authority isn't always about being the boss. If you go straight to angry, you get angry back. By giving my student the wiggle room required to control their decision making. I am empowering them to be a more effective self manager and an independent learner.